Week Sixteen

On Monday, encouraged by comforting words from Keith, I tackle the plumbing.  Fun or what?  Within an hour I have all the connections, all the bits in between and, what’s more, IT LOOKS LIKE THE PICTURE!  I am very chuffed with myself.  Guy turns up to help and is suitably stunned that it is all done.  However, this is dry plumbing – now I have to take it all apart and glue it together.  Space is limited, and it occurs to me that if I do that, Wyn the Wire won’t be able to wire up the heater or the pump.  I phone Wyn who agrees to come round on Tuesday evening and do the necessary wiring, and then I can glue the plumbing together.

On Tuesday I book Wednesday as a half day’s holiday from work in order to glue the plumbing.  But – Wyn can’t come.  I can’t plumb without the electrics being in place, I can’t put the cover over the pool without the plumbing in place, and I can’t (I don’t think) fill it with water without the cover.  Bugger.  Guy turns up with two more bottles of sloe gin bought on clearance.  One of them says ‘Sloe Licquer’ and, bearing in mind that we can’t get on with ANYTHING in the cabin, we drown our sorrows by having a tasting session….

On Wednesday I have my half day anyway, and also an extraordinary stroke of luck.  I leave for work earlier than usual and decide that, as I’m having half a day, I won’t need a paper to read at lunch time.  However, as I’m driving to work approaching the paper shop I decide, at the last nano-second, that I will stop after all.  When I’m in the shop a flat bed truck pulls up.  He has a load of stunning looking slabs that would be just perfect for the steps from the lawn up to the cabin.  I ask him if he'd like to sell me some, and he says they’re all promised for a job down the road, but that he can supply more.  We agree a price (very reasonable), I give him directions and I go to work.  During the afternoon he turns up with the slabs and I tell him what an amazing coincidence it was that we should meet.  It turns out it’s more amazing than I thought – he never normally drives that way to the job, and it’s the first day he’s taken that route.  Spooky or what?  Anyway, the slabs are lovely and so when Vincent and Sarah come to stay in two weeks’ time I have something for them to play with…

In the afternoon I add battens and polystyrene to the floor in readiness for the floorboards…
On Wednesday evening, still stumped on the plumbing front, Guy and I go off to do a car treasure hunt with the Woodlands Trust.  We do 7 out of 10 clues and then give up and head for the pub…  Worryingly, the water in the pool is beginning to go cloudy….

On Thursday my friend Anna comes to visit and so we lay floorboards.  Well, we do like to make our guests feel welcome….  I cut, and Guy and Anna wallop nails in.   I think I would have gone on all night but, probably luckily, we run out of nails and so we have to stop.

The water in the pool really is cloudy, so I decide to syphon it out – we set it up and sadly watch the water LEAVING the pool.  Not good.  Guy, who is not feeling at all well, goes home – and Anna and I head for the pub for a meal.  Excellent pub, excellent food, girlie chat and putting the world to rights.  Can’t fault it!  And she gave me two lovely bangles to match the car.  Seriously!

On Friday more floorboards are delivered.  Weirdly, I seem to have miscalculated hugely on the quantity.   However, all becomes apparent when the new boards arrive – they are wider.  It seems that originally when I ordered 6” floorboards they delivered 4 ½ “.  It didn’t occur to me to measure them!  No wonder I don’t have enough.  The new boards obviously don’t match, so they will have to go back.  Guy and I do all we can with the ones we have … and then have to stop.  It seems only fair that I offer to cook after Guy’s hard work – so we have a Chinese takeaway.

On Saturday Wyn arrives to do more electrics, and Guy and I disappear to the builders merchants to sort out the floorboards.  Did I mention that I have now spent so much money there that I have been given a trade card?  Well – I have.  I am also on first name terms with all the staff….  We sort out the boards, and also select skirting board and more tongue and groove.  And then realise it won’t all fit in the car.  The lovely lads at the builder’s merchants say that they can deliver, so Guy goes on ahead and I get to ride in the lorry to explain where my house is.

We carry on floorboarding, and Wyn does more electrics.  I have to confess I don’t understand electricity AT ALL, so if he asks if the double sided screwed flangel widget should be on the wall, I just agree with whatever he is suggesting.  It seems more complicated than I had envisaged, and I am beginning to wonder if it will ever get finished.  I still can’t complete the plumbing, but Wyn promises to come back on Sunday to do yet more.  Guy has a gig and leaves at teatime, but Wyn carries on until about 7.  And after that I start sanding the floorboards….. physical job or what?  I had forgotten what hard work this is, and find that the only way I can operate the small sander is to stand with my feet wide apart and bend forward.  Boy, am I going to be stiff tomorrow!  However, I am fortified by sloe gin and chocolate in equal measures.  Damned fine idea.  I rough sand, medium sand and fine sand.  I have attached the vacuum cleaner to the sander and it seems to be collecting all the dust, and we have also covered the pool with a plastic sheet.  However, the vacuum arrangement might have been just a teensy bit more effective if I had remembered to Switch The Damned Thing On.  After sanding, I vacuum and then woodstain the floor.  By now it is 9pm, and I have been on the go since 7am…. I am KNACKERED.  And woodstained.  Which, as far as I can see, is a very good substitute for fake tan.  I am past cooking and resort to the Chinese takeaway again.  Except this time I can’t even face the washing up and eat with a plastic fork straight from the dishes….

On Sunday I am up at 6 to start varnishing the floor.  Thank goodness for Ronseal Quick Dry Floor Varnish (it does exactly what it says on the tin).  I do a second coat at 8 and another at 10.  Phew.
Wyn arrives for more electrics and Guy and I start putting a tongue and groove wall on the end of the pool.  We can’t do all the way round as we have to leave a gap for the equipment panel – and we can’t do that until THE PLUMBING IS DONE.  Which can’t be done until THE ELECTRICS ARE DONE.  The panel is easy to do, so we run out of work relatively quickly.

We sit in the kitchen and name all the ducks for the duck racing instead….  Wyn is having trouble with the electrics – the American labelling does not tally with the UK wiring so I phone the US helpline and wait for them to call back.  Then I phone the number of a UK pool installer called Andi – maybe he can help.   And this is another stroke of luck (that’s two in one week – I must check my lottery ticket!).  Andi is on his way from Milton Keynes to Plymouth and says that he can take a detour to Caerphilly to advise… Brilliant or what?  I gratefully take him up on his offer, and we wait.  Actually, we don’t just wait – I hurtle around tidying up the kitchen and making the outside loo cleaner…. I ignore the sitting room on the basis that it is a lost cause – because of needing the floor clear for varnishing, the Workmate and chop saw are now also in my sitting room.  Along with the new skirting board and tongue and groove and all the plumbing stuff which got abandoned and had to be moved out of the cabin….

Andi and his girlfriend Helen arrive – Andi is incredibly fragile as he has been kicked at point blank range by a horse and lost a kidney and a large chunk of his spleen.  Good grief.  I feel guilty at even making him get out of the car.  I make cups of tea all round, Andi and Wyn are introduced (Andi – Wyn, Wyn – Andi) and we leave them to it.  Helen, Guy and I sit in the kitchen and we tell her some of the adventures we have had along the way.  I can see her looking at the scars on my arm, so I am at some pains to point out that it was the cat that attacked me and that I do not self-harm….  And she likes the ducks!

Andi is an absolute star and gives all sorts of useful advice - he points Wyn in the right direction for the wiring (agreeing that it is tricky because of the US/UK thing), and tells me that I must remove the corners from the benches in the pool and fill it up again.  And that I’ve missed out two screws.  There is all sorts of other useful advice, and I am VERY glad that he has visited – Wyn is happier about the wiring, I am happier that I may one day have a pool that works, and Guy is happier because I’m happier.  Helen is lovely and admires the cabin.  And I still feel guilty about making Andi do anything other than breathe…..

They go, Wyn goes, I put in the two lost screws and start filling up the pool with water again…. Tomorrow we can plumb and really fill the pool up. HOORAY!  I still have no idea when it will all be connected and switched on, but I am still hopeful that it will be ready for the Grand Opening on 29th August….  I’m more of an optimist than I thought!

Hours worked: Not many in the week (well ok, I did the plumbing and the floor) but Saturday was 7am – 9pm, and Sunday was 6am – 9pm.  AAAARRRGGGHHH.  That’s Way Too Many hours!
Achieved:  Electrics ‘getting there’, dry plumbing sorted (but now dismantled again), pool emptied, pool half filled, flooring completed, half pool wall done.  Skirting boards stained once in readiness for fitting.
Wine consumed: None at all.  But my vast stocks of sloe gin are seriously depleted….
Pressies and purchases: Zippo.  Unless you count tongue and groove, skirting and more floorboards, bought with my new Builders’ Merchants Trade Card!
Plan for next week: Glue plumbing, fill up pool.  Electrics hopefully sometime.