Week Nine

The blower and dehumidifier are doing their stuff, the pit base is drying out nicely, and I’m emptying about three buckets of water a day from the cabin.  On Tuesday it starts raining – and it doesn’t stop.  The delivery I’m expecting of tongue and groove and insulation doesn’t arrive – but that’s ok, it means another night of rest for my hand which is tired after my return to work.

On Wednesday morning (still raining) I go to empty the bucket and find that the cabin is WETTER THAN EVER.  Damp is coming UP through the pit base – that’s the pit base that Mike the Base said NO DAMP WOULD COME THROUGH.   To say I am disheartened is putting it mildly…..  I rant about Bloody Builders to the inside of the cabin, and decide on Plan B.  (Or is it Z by this time?)  I know a fantastic chap called Dave the Damp – retired now, but he is an absolute whizz with damp problems, and sorted out the sodden house when I bought it.  Time to call him in, I think!

I phone Dave the Damp.  Yes, he’d be delighted to help but Not For Three Weeks.  He is on his way to the airport for a holiday in Lanzarote.  AAAAaaarrrrgggghhh.  He must sense the desperation in my voice because he offers lots of useful advice over the phone and the upshot is that if we bitumen paint the pit we should be fine.  And we’ll do the cabin floor for good measure.

All the tongue and groove (540m!) and 25 sheets of polystyrene insulation have been delivered and put inside the cabin, so they all need to be moved out before we can treat the floor.  We put everything in my sitting room.  No, it’s not that big – it’s just Very Full of Stuff.  Put it like this – I can’t get to the telly without climbing over the tongue and groove.   I watch less telly.

Guy and I paint.  The bitumen STINKS – we are as high as kites before very long, and it’s like spreading treacle….. We ruin 4 brushes, two pairs of gloves – and run out of stuff.  So Thursday night is more of the same.  Izzy comes for a look, decides she can’t stand the smell and legs it down the garden.  Which is just as well as I need to leave the doors open for it to dry out.  

To get rid of the smell I have a long hot bath and have just got to that lovely ‘clean’ stage when BB comes in – his feet covered in bitumen.  And twigs.  And leaves.  And gravel.  And anything else he could pick up en route from cabin to bathroom……  This may sound heartless – but I find it very funny.  Well, he did bite me…  He is quite the most stupid cat I have ever met.  I clean some of it off with nail varnish remover (works like white spirit but doesn’t smell as bad!) and pick most of the leaves out.  I am now sticky again.  I am rapidly going off this cat.  He doesn't appreciate my assistance, so I leave him to pick the bits out with his teeth.  Which occupies him for all of the evening and most of the night….

On Saturday it pours.  And doesn’t stop – we can’t work in the cabin because the bitumen is still drying out, and we can’t work outside because of the rain.  So we watch some of the installation DVD instead.  We sort of understand it… still veering between ‘we can do this’ and Oh my god’!  By Saturday evening I am again unwell – not sure if it’s the after effects of the massive dose of antibiotics or a bug, Guy goes to his gig on his own, and I stay home.  I’m not going to give you all the gory details, but Guy lends me a Shrek video and I decide it contains WAY too much information about toilets and bodily functions… and besides, I can’t get to the telly.

On Sunday I am still pathetically unwell, so Guy puts up guttering to protect the shed and re-bitumens the floor again.  I manage to talk to Gareth the Wood who will do the carpentry on the surround for me.  We show him the DVD, diagrams, photographs and my plan – AND HE UNDERSTANDS IT!  Already I like him. The doors of the cabin are open to help the bitumen dry…. and then it rains again….  The bitumen is black.  The cabin now looks like a sleazy bachelor pad… but at least it’ll be a dry sleazy bachelor pad…

Hours worked: I have no idea.  I am now painting bitumen in my sleep and Just Don’t Get Me Started On Bloody Builders Who Don’t Put In Damp Proof Courses… Working hours: Probably 9 or 10.  Ranting hours: Many and ongoing.  STRESSED, MOI?   Gave up ranting when the bug started.
Achieved:  Pit base dry, walls still seeping water – more bitumen needed.  Found a carpenter and ordered iroko for the surround (like teak but a fraction of the cost!)
Drink consumed: None until Tuesday because of the antibiotics.  Serious damage to a bottle of Sloe Gin since then but only because I was still ranting about Bloody Builders.  None since Saturday.
Casualties:  BB’s paws.  Well, it was entirely his own fault, but he is STILL picking bits of bitumen out… (animal rights activists please note:  no lasting damage, and it WAS funny….)
Get Well Cards Received: Lots – thank you!  Especially appreciated was the one from Guy’s mum Joy showing a cat sharpening it’s claws….
Purchases and Pressies: Nearly £300 worth of bitumen.  BLOODY BUILDERS. Two folding wooden chairs and a folding wooden table for the patio area outside the cabin.  And 5 tons of gravel.
Pool Progress:  The ‘Ever Divine’ docks in England on 29th June!  Then there’s some paperwork, then a lorry, then it gets DELIVERED!  Could perhaps arrive this week, may try and delay till Monday of next week to make life easier….